O.K., Charles Schultz never said that- or then again, maybe he did but he was never quoted as saying it- authentically anyway. But a great friend of mine often used that quote, when speaking about art, attributing it to Charles Schultz which has never failed to crack me up. Fun stuff.
Creating fake quotes, or using quotes inappropriately is a lot of fun. Back in the early neolithic when my group of friends used to have parties all the time, I used to sneak quotes in on the party fliers, one of my favorite being "Sleek, sexy entertainment!" - Newsweek, David Ansen. Again: fun stuff.
What am I yammering on about?
The voting for the 'Dynamic Duo' painting contest on The Warhammer Forum ended, and my Halfling & Ogre didn't win. I did get a very respectable second place however, so "I'll get you Red Baron!" might be appropriate. But what actually stirred the memory of this misquote was a clever fellow on the forum took the winning picture, of two Imperial Guardsmen, and made a speaking & thought bubble for them, so people could have fun and a bit of competition to put words in their mouth. Yet again: Fun Stuff.
If you feel like putting words in their mouth, you can download the blank picture below, use a program to type in words and post it up the forum!
Click for larger:
and my idea of what they are thinking:
So go on, have some fun with it :)
In other news, just been several days of long work hours.
The Genestealer Cult army is finished, other than the flyer bases and gloss on optics.
So hopefully will have some of that to show soon.
I skipped out on last Friday's game night to put more work in, and haven't had any time for any of my painting projects, but maybe I'll be able to squeeze a bit in in the near future.
SPAM:
And today, three spam comments got through the spam filter. Only 2 have ever made it through before, but today 3 slipped through? Not sure how or why. I don't want to switch to captcha, because I hate it. I hate filling them out to leave a comment, so don't want to do it to anyone else. I may make it so people can't post anonymously, as I've only seen 1 real, non-spam anon comment. If you do leave comments using the anonymous, not 'signed in' format, and maybe you create a name when you do, let me know, since I don't want to make it impossible for people to leave a comment, and never know it because they can't leave a comment to let me know they can't leave a comment. But if no one uses the anon comment function, that might be a solution if spam keeps seeping through. Because I don't want spammers to succeed. If canceling anonymous comments would leave people without a way to comment who do, then I'd go with moderation: since I work from home, I can check it fairly often to click 'approve', but I won't use captcha.
So if turning off anonymous comments is an issue, let me know.
There are those who belief that life exists beyond the nations of Earth. That there are tribes of aliens in the inner, and perhaps outer planets. That some of these, the Quar of the moons of Mars, even now, make their way to the great moon of Earth, seeking safety, and to plunder resources for their very survival.
Gaming continues for Empire of the Dead but on the horizon is the next miniatures project: a return to a VSF campaign.This time the location switches from Venus, to nearer Earth's territory: the Moon. Alfrik has been compiling ideas for the campaign, which will have not only army-scale fighting in 28mm but he's got plans for aeronef (airship) fleet action battles as part of the campaign. I'm a sucker for anything with ships: spaceships, airships & navies, so this sounds good to me! Nations of Earth, and my Quar of Phobos,will be staking out claims on the Moon, negotiating, plotting and waging battles. When will this be? Not sure exactly, but it's just over the horizon.
-It's continued to be a very very bad week for me, so have had low motivation to do anything for myself, just working on the finishing stages of the Genestealer Cult, but nothing ready to show on it yet, so not a lot of new stuff to share. So seems a good time to introduce the air-navy of Phobos!
I bought these last year when BrigadeModels UK was having a sale, and I added a couple ships from Shapeways.
(click for larger)
I don't know yet what the campaign will require for number of ships or ship types, but this feels like a good fleet compliment. The majority of the fleet is from the Argentina fleet. I chose them for 2 reasons:
1. British & French fleets,while cool, seem to be pretty popular and I wanted something different.
2. I love the big round shapes incorporated into these ships. It seems right, considering Quar have big round bellies, or 'puzik' as I tend to call it, having picked up the Russian word since it is far cuter. but the ships also still have pointed noses,again, just like Quar! Perfect!
Speaking of Russian, the round vessel with 4 guns is a Russian 'aerial battery' which fits in nicely with the round midsections of the Argentinian fleet: just right for Quar.
I added aircraft: some large bombers and fighter squadrons.
I used this basing method once before for space ship fighters, and like it a lot. You get a lot of variety with the individual wire stands.
The carrier model is from Shapeways, and I imagine this is one of the vessels that is space-worthy.
The rest of the fleet is carried or towed by space-haulers to deposit the airfleet into a planet's (or moon's) gravitational field.
Some close-ups: (click for larger)
I'm afraid I don't remember the name of the shapeways artist or the name of the piece. But there are a lot of nice items on that site.
The carrier is the flagship, though the one battleship would be pretty significant.
Hopefully this fleet will be battling the verminous humans, who's gluttony is unsatisfied with the most resource-rich planet in the system: it's time for the other peoples to push them back, contain them and harvest their fair share from the planets and moons of the sun they share in common!
Making the rounds is the 'Are you a proper wargamer' quiz, and in true wargaming spirit it's already been modified with home-brew changes and additions. I believe this is the latest incarnation, from Dampf, via Big Lee. Though I also made adjustments to it. The test will begin in a moment, please be seated and wait your turn.
Just answer. Timing is a factor. They're just questions, designed to provoke a wargaming response.
HAVE YOU:
1. Spent at least £500 on figures / tanks?
Yes. : 1
You mean annually right? Because if you mean in total, ever, you need to ratchet up that number!
2. Pricked your finger or thumb on a pike block - several times Yes. : 1
3. Tried at least 10 different rule sets and vowed never to play half of them ever again Yes. : 1
As close to such a vow as I get, which isn't completely, but certainly many I've given up on.
4. Bought an army off EBay No. : 0
5. Sold an army on EBay Yes. : 1
6. spent months painting an army - then used it in anger once Yes. : 1
Once, or less- some I haven't had the chance.
7. tried several different periods and genres Yes. : 1
8. dropped a box of figures on the floor from a great height No. : 0
9. lost a battle on the last throw of the dice Yes. : 1 .
Isn't that how most battles are lost?
10. made at least one enemy for life
Yes. : 1 .
I wouldn't call them 'enemies': that is a title reserved for the real enemies I have. But intolerable ass-hats who I'd rather avoid and would consider playing a game with, hoping to have fun, a completely hopeless prospect and so I wouldn't bother? Yes, have run across a couple of those.
11. had a proper, stand up argument over a wargamers table Yes. : 1 .
See above.
12. thrown a dice across a room or inflicted damage on a die that 'let you down'. No. : 0.
I'm not generally given to physical displays and outbursts. Be nice to dice if you wish them to be nice to you.
13. rebased an army for a different rule set Yes. : 1 .
Please Recycle.
14. inflicted a whopping defeat on an opponent Yes. : 1 .
Sweet, sweet victory
15. suffered an embarrassing defeat due to a stupid tactical decision Yes. : 1 .
Hey even Napoleon made some stupid decisions.
16. joined a wargamers club Yes. : 1 .
This seems more UK-centric. we don't have the organized clubs here, but more informal groups, sure.
17. bought a ton of lead that remains unpainted Yes. : 1 .
This really should be the litmus test shouldn't it?
18. been to a wargamers show Yes. : 1 .
Again, more UK-centric. replace with 'Gaming Convention' and yes, many of them.
19. have more dice than is logical or necessary to own - and have used most of them Yes. : 1 .
I take exception to your implication that having dice in a color to match each army and team is not a necessity.
20. have taken boxes of troops down to a club just to show them off to your mates Yes. : 1 .
And now some extra questions.... -Needed now that Tyrel Corp has introduced the Nexus 6 Gamer.
21. You have reference books on each period / army you play
Yes. : 1 .
22. played so many different games you confidently quote rules for a totally different period, scale or ruleset to the one you're playing at that moment Yes. : 1 .
23. You have had dreams in which game mechanics described real-world events Yes. : 1 .
Conflict in dreams described in hit points or travel understood in a dream by movement distance and rates.
Yes, this stuff gets in my mind and becomes the 'language' used to express experiences. 23. You get genuinely excited when a package arrives in the post Yes. : 1 .
24. You have joined a re-enactment society No. : 0.
25. You have played in an unsuitable venue Yes. : 1 . Once even played the Dune boardgame all night, sitting on the cement, waiting in line for tickets for Dead Can Dance.
26. You continue to search for the perfect genre rule set and have not found one that satisfies you Yes. : 1 .
27. For that reason you have developed your own house rules for certain periods. And think them far superior to the original author's efforts. Yes. : 1 .
28. You have returned from a wargames show and sneaked upstairs to hide the stash or lied to your romantic partner about how much money you spent . No. : 0. 29. You have an irrational aversion to some genres and vow never to play them regardless of how much fun they look. Yes. : 1 .
Not sure it's absolute,but certainly some genres or settings hold little to no interest for me, such as:
Vietnam, Modern, US Civil War.
30. You have made your own wargames scenery. Yes. : 1 .
31. You have reached a painting 'wall' at some point, either now or in the past Yes. : 1 .
I reached a point once where I couldn't see any improvement, and it took a lot to break past that and start again to improve.
32. You have lost - and regained - your wargaming mojo. Yes. : 1 .
How often do I get strings of bad luck where I can't make rolls in Blood Bowl where I have an 8/9 chance of success (or better)? But It always comes back around. But I will not make a double go-for-it to score unless it's the last turn of the half. I know it's just asking for it.
33. have you ever bought a wargaming book or miniatures while traveling or on vacation,despite being able to get it cheaper at home, just so you would have gaming items that was bought in someplace foreign or far from home? Yes. : 1 .
Much better than a tourist-trinket!
34. You have done armies in different scales for the same period Yes. : 1 .
35. You have jealously coveted someone else's troops. Yes. : 1 .
That whole 'shall not covet' is a bunch of nonsense. Thou shall covet! and if you're lucky, people will covet what you have too- you know you want them too.
36. You have laughed (secretly or otherwise) at someone else's paint job Yes. : 1 .
There's some really weird stuff out there. Laughing can be the appropriate response.
37. You have provided a piece of useless trivia relating to the troops on the table to show off your wargaming knowledge. Yes. : 1 .
38. You have contradicted someone elses' trivia - demonstrating your superior knowledge and giving you a warm glow inside. Yes. : 1 .
Just doing my part to further knowledge.
39. You have caused a major disaster on a wargames table (spilling a pint, collapsing the table, dropped someone else's figures on the floor). No. : 0.
Just lucky I guess
40. You have cheered when an opponent's dice lets them down at a critical point
Yes. : 1 .
If you're not excited and relieved for your little guys, you're not involved in the game!
41. You have lied to your partner about going gaming. No. : 0.
Why would I? I never understood that. You're an adult, you can't spend your free time doing what you enjoy? It's not like you're going out to steal cars.
42. You have lied to an attractive woman (man) about your hobby. No. : 0.
Again, never understood why not. I guess some fear being ridiculed? If someone would give grief over it, that says more about how disastrously immature they are, doesn't it?
43. You have made an opponent cry. It doesn't count if they are under 8 years old though. Yes. : 1.
At first I put no.. but I'd forgotten, this did happen once. Long ago, at a 40k GT. I was playing my nearly-all Ork Bike army, it was against Space Wolves. My previous game had been against Space Wolves too, and I'd been tabled - it was a real 'glass cannon' army. But this time, I tabled him. By turn 3 he didn't have anything left on the battlefield and I'd suffered almost no damage. And he cried. I felt terrible, until in his almost-silent sobs he also said my army was broken and cheesy! That was too much, I said 'sorry you're unhappy, but my last game was against wolves and I got crushed just as bad as you just did- the army isn't cheesy, it's just a game and anything can happen." But yeah. He cried. 44. You have painted the same army in the same scale more than once Yes. : 1 . 45. You have reference books on armies you haven't even got. Yes. : 1 .
Luckily so. Otherwise I'd have bought even more minis than I have unpainted now. Sometimes just fun to look at other potential armies, even when not planning to build it.
46. You have bought figures for a period you have never and will never play - because they were cheap. Yes. : 1 . Never play? there is always hope.
47. You blog or have a web-page about your Wargaming activities
Yes. : 1 .
48. Your book collection is almost all war and wargames related No. : 0 .
Unless very loosely defined. Most of my books are Science Fiction, Fantasy & Alternate History Novels for fiction and History for non-fiction. I do have a lot of gaming books, but not near as many as the rest.
49. You critique 'war' movies (especially Hollywood war movies) for historical accuracy. Yes. : 1 .
Would not mind being hired to help historical accuracy in films actually, I'm always running across mistakes.
50. You spend car / train journeys checking out the lie of the land - considering which way you would attack from and whether it would make good wargaming terrain. Yes. : 1 .
I've found my mind wandering in that direction,yes.
Note: I combined the question from the additional Big lee questions about inflicting damage to a die with the original question set about throwing a die across the room, and combined the original questions 23 with 28, since hiding stash & lying about purchases was really the same issue.I replaced 23 with a new question, so now any injury or insult to dice are part of the same question, I also changed question 33, which was about feeling guilty when complaining about family's spending when having spent yourself on unused miniatures, since I felt this question was already covered conceptually by questions about hiding gaming stash/lying as well as the question about having a lot of unpainted lead. I replaced it with a new question for a new issue. This rounds the test to a nice-for-statistical-ease of 50 questions.
Results:
41/50: 82% B-
Conclusion: I am a replicant- I mean, a wargamer. It seems the test believes the most infused wargamer is either dishonest about it to others, or has such a spending problem that to not hide it would endanger their safety and open them up to reprisals.
Well, it's been both a very busy and a very bad week.
The kind of week that makes you question what the point of anything is when it seems people are trying their hardest to make the world as terrible as they possibly can and prevent any common sense and modicum of kindness from having an effect enough to help you find a better way.
I also saw Cloud Atlas, which was a great movie, though I'm sure one of the central themes is "no matter where you live, and what age you're living in, you have something in common with everyone else in all times and places: the world sucks."
All of the problems are prevalent because so many are selfish cruel jerks enjoying making things worse for everyone else. All those against you are far more powerful than you and your allies will ever be. And really, aren't they just making everything worse for themselves too? And yet they persist.
But what can you do? What is the alternative?
So roll with it. Grab the hand of the one you love, share knowing smiles with your friends, and say fuck it to the rest. And you just might find your chance to carve out a nook of happy life.
Or not, but you have to try right?
In that vein, here's a touch of fun a friend of mine forwarded to me:
You're on a flight, and you won't be landing for a good long time, but some joker has to get out of his seat, and make ready to leave, as if he can walk faster than the aircraft is going. Of course this upsets the flight crew, and spreads tension, and just makes the flight worse for everyone. They say it's dangerous, I don't know about that... it's not going to break the plane is it? Then again....
This is the centerpiece for the genestealer cult army. I feel every army should have a centerpiece:
One item that is bigger, more dynamic, more impressive than the rest of the army. One item which will serve to draw the eye to the center of the army, and as the eye wanders around to the rest of it, will pull it back to the centerpiece.
All of the vehicles have infestation, and some are even piloted by alien creatures, like the walkers with the tentacle & brain creatures. 2 of the aircraft have creatures piloting them like the walkers..
which are hopefully pretty cool in their own right. But the theory of a centerpiece is let one item take the spotlight like nothing else, and it will be better over-all for the army than if everything was at that level.
Like a crescendo in music, the composition needs somewhere to go: if every moment as loud and thunderous the listener would get worn out and lose interest. Tchaikovsky understood this, a lot of death metal bands don't.
So this is the moment the piece kicks in. Yes, it's an army, out to destroy the enemy, but at it's heart is the unthinking growth & aggression that is Tyranid DNA. Something too big to be contained any longer by its host of human body and technology is coming to its own. Will he bring the plane down? Perhaps. But i suspect he'll be fine, while his targets will not.
The back panel is busting outward, showing that he has growth-expanded from the inside.
The upper hole is smaller than the bulk of his chest, for 2 reasons:
1. practical: unless breaking the engines,there isn't a spot on the plane that is wider than his chest.
2. dynamic biology: he's in the process of growing- rapidly- right now, plus I imagine he can expand his chest, like a cobra's hood, to threaten other creatures, and so, like a rat, can squeeze through openings that are seemingly much smaller than his size.
I'm very pleased with the result: the creature ends up with a lot more serpentine motion than the original model since it doesn't have to stand supported on his tail.
Painting is already in progress,but I wanted to save the picture for a Halloween scare- I'm sure that in the year 40,000 there are many kids dressing up as Tyranids for Halloween!
Speaking of, Happy Halloween everyone!
I hope you get to gather with those you care about and enjoy the night!
But if you're flying, I hope all the passengers remain seated...
The Dynamic Duo, the pair of Big & Small, Old & New are finished.
(Click for larger)
The halfling is Geoffo Timbershank, a name he earned by losing his leg in the Goblin Wars.
In the thick of the fighting, hard pressed, Geoffo was looking into the snarling face of his own doom.
A nasty goblin, with two wicked blades had cut him many times and just disarmed him, his sturdy broad short sword lying out of reach. But just then he heard a bellow from one of the Ogre Mercenaries and out out of the corner of his eye he saw an Ogre hatchet lobbed his way. It was a large and heavy weapon, and Geoffo needed two hands to wield it. But he did so, and just in time to bury it in the goblin's skull.
The Ogre had problems of his own, dealing with a raging troll. Both were wounded, but as everyone knows, a wounded troll is not wounded for long. Geoffo ran to the battling brutes, raised the hatchet high in the air and swung down hard on the troll's foot! The creature roared in pain, lashing out with a rusty cleaver that sliced Geoffo's leg clean off. But the distraction was just long enough for the Ogre to thrust his battle spear up through the Troll's neck and out the top of his skull.
After the battle, the Ogre went to find out if the halfling had survived. He had, though it was a close call.
"I thank you for the loan of your axe, Ogre." Geoffo said weakly.
"I'm called Moose," he said, "and I'm grateful I gave it to you. Keep it."
"Thank you, but I think I'm not well suited to it." Geoffo replied.
"Hrmmm. Then perhaps you should use the haft for a new leg. It is lucky I think."
From that moment on the two would be inseparable, seeking adventure and battle.
For the Prehistoric Pulp setting, I'm planning for the game to be more than just faction vs faction.
That is how most games work: you bring your army your opponent brings theirs and your two armies clash.
This works fine for most historical and quasi-historical combat, where humans are at the top of the heap and safe from anything other than rival human groups. But Prehistory is much more dangerous than that.
Not only are there many species in evolution-fueled struggle for dominance, but none have such advanced technology and culture that they are not still tucked within the food chain, rather than high above it.
So this game will have threats beyond your opponent: ones that view you both the same: invaders into their territory, or perhaps as lunch.
So here is one of the creatures to be feared by everyone: the king of the woodlands, Gigantogorillini.
These, the largest of the primates, are solitary lords of the woodlands, though, secure in the safety of their great size, it is not uncommon to see them venture out into the grasslands. Larger even than members of the Yheti tribe and Gigantopithecus tribe, these massive creatures are hard to mistake. Perhaps the only thing preventing this species from becoming a greater dominating force is the fact that they are few in number and live solitary lives, only coming together to mate. Youths do band together, but these avoid conflict when possible. The same can not be said for the adult males. Nearly twice the size of females, and formidable at heights up to 4 meters and arm span even greater, they are left alone by all but the largest of the ancient predators. Smaller creatures, even the sentient tribes hold deep respect for these giant primates, and healthy fear, for they are omnivorous. Some tribes have even been known to worship them as gods.
