Thursday, September 26, 2013

Lizards Need a Big Star: No Kroxigor Star Player? Fixed. Welcome Hurtza Lotle

I am calling out the bigotry of the mammals!

No longer will the cold blooded stand for under-representation in the field of Blood Bowl!

I checked: every big guy race is represented by a Star Player!

The Minotaurs have their Grashnak Blackhoof
The Treemen have their Deeproot Strongbranch  (The only player to keep use of his Porn Name)
The Trolls have their Ripper
The Rat Ogres have Headsplitter
The Yehtee Snow Trolls even have a star: Icepelt Hammerblow
The Ogres have three! Brick, Bertha, and Morg 'n' Thorg.
Even the Mummies, not quite true Big Guys, have Ramtut III !

The Beast of Nurgle doesn't have a star, but I'm not so sure that oozing poster child of the dangers of
unprotected sex is a race, but if they are they should seek an advocacy group too, if they can find anyone who wants to be near them.

But the noble Kroxigor race should have contributed a Star to Blood Bowl by now.
I can only assume it is Mammalian Elitism that has refused to let a Kroxigor into their ranks.

But that ends now!

Kroxigors are one of the best Big Guys in all of Blood Bowl and play for 2 different teams!

So it is high time they have a Star for Hire.
If needing to make room, teams can dump Morg off their prospected players.. that guy is n't serious about wanting to play, just look at his 450,000 appearance fee.

So I propose the Kroxigor Star Hurtza Lotle :

Hurtza Lotle began his career in 2509 with the Crudwater Revilers.  His coach described him as 'a danger to himself and others' and truer words were never spoken. Hurtza caused 18 casualties in his first season, 4 of which were deaths.  When asked he merely replied " I'm Ssstill Hungry " and consumed the reporter. 

From there Hurtza propelled his team into the playoffs where they lost to the Blightburg Bastards. 
But it was nonetheless an impressive rookie year for the big Krox. 

In subsequent seasons Hurtza proved himself to be remarkably agile for a big reptile as well as coherent of thought. Rare traits indeed!  As the years went on however it became ever more obvious that Hurtza was simply not a team player.  One could call it hubris if not for fear of being sued by Dark Elf lawyers.  Hurtza's popularity rose with the fans who loved to see the two ton reptile rampage the pitch. He was a relentless hunter and nothing seemed to be able to stop him once he got a sent of his prey.  

Unfortunately, Reviler's coach found him unreliable as he simply ignored the team plays, preferring to do whatever he felt best.  He got results, but he was unpredictable at best.  This, combined with his rising popularity and ever-increasing demands for higher contracts caused the Revilers to let him go in 2513.

When asked for comment, Hurtza replied, "Who needs them?" and ate the reporter. 
Since then Hurtza has sought acceptance into the ranks of free agents.  
Time will tell if Blood Bowl is ready for a non-mammal in this mammal dominated sport. 


By the way, this marks my 500th post! 

Wow, how did that happen? 

When I started this blog I wasn't sure how long it would last or if I'd have much to say.  
That should have been considered a foolish thought, I probably have too much to say. 

500 down, doubt the back 500 between now and post 1,000 will be too hard to get to,though I doubt I'd have kept going if people were not reading them, so thanks for being here and commenting! 


Andrew Saunders said...

I have to agree Lizards need a Proper start player!! congrats on the 500 post

Sean said...

Nice figure and I like the stat card. Congrats on the milestone.

Edwin King said...

Hoping to be around for number 1,000 ;-)

Tristan M said...

I think he should be AG1 & 320gp
Also the high MV + tail + shadowing synergize very well, some playtesting might determine that 30k for shadowing is too little.

Laughing Ferret said...

Thanks guys :)

Tristan: he might need to raise his cost, I was reluctant to go too high in cost and make him out of the field of the other big guys, but was also reluctant to make him Ag 1 since I love the idea of potentially dodging with him. The juggernaut, high movement & shadowing is the core of his play style, so I'd rather have AG drop to 1 than cost him out of typical Big Guy star range. Still though, since mino, yehtee, rat ogre star all have frenzy that's a big advantage skill compared to shadowing (?) & Deeproot has block and Ripper can TTM, so the others might have more usefulness than the cost of the skills indicate, and this guy's ability, while good might be more situational, so maybe warrant less cost. Would need play testing, this is just the initial idea :)

fireymonkeyboy said...

Congrats on 500 points!


Bill said...

Oh my, Shadowing. That is fun. Reminds me of the time I was tailgated by a Peterbuilt Truck. Not necessarily a fun thing.

Congrats on the Milestone.

Barks said...

Congratulations on the 500! I hadn't realised that there were no Krox stars, well done on correcting that oversight. Also, I shall now be unable to play against Deeproot without giggling.

Anonymous said...

I love the name for Hurtza. Congrats on the 500th post!

Tristan M said...

I think giving him shadowing is very interesting - I didn't notice the juggernaut. That might require some increase to cost. It's not as valuable as on a frenzy model, but still has value.

I like the vision you have for his playstyle, I just don't think "potentially dodging" fits. I more see him blitzing free to mark/shadow the piece you want rather than attempting a 50/50 dodge you won't want to reroll to hit the piece you want to mark and thus potentially not need shadowing ;)

If you made him AG1 then a price between 340 & 360 should be very valid.

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